i am dustin diaz

Land the perfect job

Believe it or not, some people go their entire lives without getting a job they like, when they most certainly can. And although I confess, I am blessed, I'm going to be bashful and give myself a little credit. The fact of the matter is, you deserve the job of your dreams. With a little hard work, determination, and a positive attitude - you too can land the job of your dreams. So without further ado, this one goes out to all the web developers sitting in their basement.

Learn your cheese

Having seen probably over a hundred web development resumés and interviewed about a third of them, a common pattern I tend notice is that - people lie. Granted, I'm all for sprucing up the language and making yourself look cool with better sounding sentences... yea, that's fine. Whatever. I usually only glance briefly at complicated sentences anyway. The part that I can't get over is that people will write down languages they - come to find out - barely know... and it's really disturbing, and a waste of time for both parties. For example, I've heard of Java. Yea, I've even embeded some cheese applet back in 1990. I may have even opened up some text file and changed a few configuration items to get what I need out of my cute cheese maker. But by no means am I going to put Java on my resumé since I couldn't tell you anything past what I've already told you... and I do know that there's more to Java than that. Another trend I have also been seeing is Ajax making its way onto the list of skillsets. Ok, that's fine too I guess. But come on guys, just because you've used Prototype's "Ajax.Request" method - it don't mean nuthin'. If it were me asking you the question on how to use Ajax, expect to pick up the dry-erase marker and explaining to me a little about the xmlHttpRequest object.

Do a Spell Check on resumés and Cover Letters

Not usually a big deal for me. But I know others will be giving you crap for your misspellings. Do yourself a favor and don't forget this detail.

Dress to Impress

This should be a given. This is the real world, and people judge you on what you wear. When I attended an interview, I typically wore slacks, button up, and a tie. If you own a suit, wear that. If you're a woman, then just pretend you're showing up to deliver the State of the Union Address.

No slimy fish hand-shakes

Grab that sucker and shake it like a bottle of Orange juice.

Speak up! Talk to me Baby

Be excited, you want the job don't ya? I'm tellin' ya... nobody wants to work with a stiff. And I don't want this to come across the wrong way, but I don't care if you're freakin' Einstein - if I don't like ya, chances are I'm gonna give you a thumbs down. You may be smart, but if you can't work well within a team, that's going to slow down productivity. Be creative with your answers. I want to be impressed and thrilled that you love talking about this stuff. Even if there's a flaw in the question being asked, please, yap away; I'm interested. For example, if the question normally only requires a yes or no answer such as Are you familiar with the term Semantic Markup? Don't just say yes, please, do tell more.

Have Humble Cockiness

In all honesty, I don't think there's anything wrong with being cocky. And I'm not getting this confused with being confident (even though you should entail this feature too). But if there was a mix between being humble and cocky at the same time - then do that. Of course, nobody likes a jack-ass who thinks his shit don't stink, but rather know that you're the [wo]man! You deserve to be at that interview and if they hire anyone other than you, then that company would be passing up on the next biggest thing (that's you). However in all due fairness, know that other people are better than you too, and that there's always room to improve. So while interviewing, just relax and answer to the best of your knowledge and have a good time.

Relax will ya

If the interviewer asks you if you'd like some water or coffee - just take some. Often the less formal an interview becomes - I feel like weights have been lifted from my shoulders. Any chance an interviewer gives you to take a load off, then just go for it. If I tell a joke, then please laugh... I'm funny dammit. Laughter is usually a good sign that the interview is going well.

Be Prepared

Here's a small check-list for ya.

• Show up early
• Bring extra copies of your resumé
• Have your work ready to demonstrate
• Turn off your cell phone
• Whoops, the cell phone was left on and it's ringing... Do Not Answer It!
• Do not stress about 'the list'

Follow Up, but avoid a restraining order

Unless told otherwise, it's generally ok to call the very next day. Let them know you're still interested. Leave some good commentary on how you enjoyed your time at the office. Whatever you do, just get the company to remember you without becoming the annoying guy. A simple letter no longer than a paragraph would be a great way to follow up. And shoot, it's 2006 - just send an email - we really don't care anymore. This is a position for something to do with the internet right? Yea. Show 'em you know how to use email.

Parting words for the perfect job

If you want the perfect job, you gotta apply somewhere that you're almost certain would be the perfect place to work. Just remember that you deserve a great job - so just go for it... you might even surprise yourself.

And a little homework project

If you just read this entire article and got thinking to yourself, man, wouldn't it be cool if I was working for _______? Well. What's stopping you? I challenge you to go directly to that place you're thinking about and let yourself be known. Request to speak with a recruiter or a Human Resources Director, and spread the word that you're the man. Good Luck.